Wherein The Wire Crushes All Hope

Oh, jesus. This blog. I love it so much, but sometimes it's hard to decide what to put here. Television hasn't been that great in the past week - I mean, sure, Bored To Death has been fantastic, you should all watch Bored To Death. Boardwalk Empire is having a much better season, due entirely to the awesomeness of Sexy Richard Half-Face. I watched the first episode of Downton Abbey Season 2, which was beautiful and amazing and everything I wanted it to be and I will post on it very soon but I don't want to ruin it for those people who don't watch all their tv on the internet and actually wait for things to air on a regular television set. All I'll say is that the Dowager Countess does NOT disappoint. I was going to write about Up All Night and how it is definitely the best new comedy of the season but then time got away from me and all of a sudden it is Wednesday and I decided I can write about that tonight or tomorrow but just saw there's no new episode this week. Speaking of lack of newness, I finally decided I was gonna do Glee recaps and then stupid baseball happened and is still happening and hopefully there will be a new episode to make fun of very very soon. And then I WAS going to write about How I Met Your Mother but this week's episode was decidedly lack-luster and oh man do I hate Nora but I hate even more the implication that Robin and Ted might get back together because ugh, let's leave that dead horse to be dead on the ground without beating it any more, shall we? So - now you can imagine all the alternate timelines wherein I actually wrote about those things, and we'll move on from there in this, the best and most real timeline (the evil version of me definitely lives in the HIMYM one).

I'm almost certain that part of what has been causing my blogger's ennui is that I've been watching a lot of The Wire. It took me a really long time to actually want to watch the show, because I have issues with anxiety and depression and mostly The Wire looked like an incredibly dark and depressing show about drugs and corruption. And guess what? Turns out The Wire is an incredibly dark and depressing show about drugs and corruption. That's not to say it's not good. Obviously it's good. But I don't think it's so much for people like me who lovelovelove comedy and think that every great drama should include a little levity (remember when Ms. Blankenship died and they had to wheel her out of the office without the clients seeing and Harry is all "My mother made that afghan!"? That's what I'm talking about.), and those who are also just naturally anxious people. WARNING: do not read any further if you have not seen The Wire and think that you might someday want to, because I'm about to get all kinds of spoiler-y up in here.

"It's a fancy party, Britta"

I've watched last week's episode of Community, "Remedial Chaos Theory", three times now. While it has been pretty much unanimously voted by The Internet as A Very Cool Thing, what I like most about it isn't necessarily the alternate timeline structure (though obviously that is awesome) but that this episode made clear the point that we're at with all of the characters. "Remedial Chaos Theory" wouldn't make much sense at all if it was one of the first episodes of Community that you'd seen, because each timeline is affected by the person being removed from the situation. And each timeline, even if only the seventh one really happened, reveals so much about the potential each character carries for the rest of the season.

It makes complete sense that the darkest timeline is the one where Troy leaves. Troy is a great stabilizing force for good, and should never be left behind.

So what did we learn? That even though Jeff and Annie have chemistry, they both feel weird about the age difference. That Pierce still struggles with being a horrible person, but occasionally the non-evil part of him wins. That Shirley still struggles with her identity because she is an un-hip mom baker, and thinks that the only way she'll fit in is if she plies everyone with food and disgusting pizza. That Abed is awesome (not so much a lesson as a reminder). That Annie really needs to find a new place and maybe Chezz Trobed is that place. That Britta is a stoner (duh-doy), that Troy is adorable and needs a girlfriend (DUH-DOY), and that Britta and Troy are totally gonna get together as I have been saying they would ever since that episode last season with the acting class I am a genius HUZZAH HUZZAH! And finally, that when Jeff isn't around to be too cool for school, fantastic dance parties happen and everyone is happy. Too cool for school only gets your arm cut off, Jeff. That is really the takeaway lesson here.

NEWSFLASH: New Tim Allen Sitcom Is Unfunny; Remarkably Offensive

Linda Holmes tells it like it is. Preach!

"Who ARE these people?"

Ok, let's see. With so much tv happening these days, I keep getting overwhelmed and putting off posts that I want to write until it's pretty much too late to write them. So I'm just gonna make a list of points and go down it, as I am wont to do.

- After re-watching last week's Community, I take back whatever I said about it in my last post. It was great. Everyone was great. The Chang part was a little weird, but I'm past it. Omar was great, like always. Danny Pudi's facial expressions and Donald Glover's line delivery were, like always, the best. Strike that and reverse it, and they're still The Best. "Second paintball."

- I have watched the first two episodes of House out of curiosity but man have they lost me now. I really just don't have time for the same old bullshit and House's hair is ugly and although I find Charlene Yi charming she is a terrible actress and not made for network tv and really that show is just SO BAD! So bad.

- How I Met Your Mother is actually getting better this season! I mean, it's still not up to Swarley par, but it's much better than last year. Bringing Kal Penn on was a great idea, and definitely brings some tension to the Barney's wedding plot point even though obviously Barney and Robin are getting married but also obviously they have to do something interesting to get us there. So. Good news! Also loving the Ducky Tie. That whole episode was great and boobariffic and would have been perfect had it not been for Victoria whom I despise.

"This seems to be going the usual amount of gross."

It is a goddamn travesty that I haven't written about Parks & Recreation yet. I actually started a post last weekend, but I was traveling and sleep-deprived and just couldn't find the time to finish it. But that doesn't mean that Cool Beans Ron and Pants! Pants Pants Pants Leslie weren't my favorite thing about last week, because they totally were. Because this show is the best.

In all seriousness, it is such a close call as to what I think the best current network comedy is, Parks & Rec or Community. Usually Community squeaks out on top, but Parks & Rec just fills me with such joy that I don't want to relegate it to second place. So let's say for the most part it's a tie. However - last night, Community wasn't bad, but it wasn't my favorite episode (a little too mean without enough self-deprecation), and Parks & Recreation was just GREAT so we're gonna talk about how great it was RIGHT NOW.

"You have to get on your knees to start it"

Am I going to write about the Arrested Development news? Of course I am.

Let me start by saying that of course this is incredible news and I am crazy excited and any situation that includes not only an Arrested Development movie but ALSO new episodes is pretty much my dream situation and I will freak the fuck out if that day ever arrives. BUT. Nothing is certain yet. They still have plenty of begging and pleading and bureaucratic hoops to jump through before all of that magical stuff can get made, and we all know that bureaucracy was designed to crush all that is good and wonderful in this world. I am holding out hope that everyone involved will see how many bazillions of dollars this much-anticipated project is worth, and just greenlight Mitch Hurwitz to create something amazing and dream-fulfilling and perfect and basically just make my brain explode with euphoria. But until I hear that they have started production, I'm keeping most of my excitement under wraps, because otherwise the disappointment of this NOT happening might crush me.

In other news, I think it might be time to resurrect Motherboy. It's been way too long since I spent two to three marvelously stoned and cozy days watching the entire series with my incredibly awesome friends. Arrested Development is so brilliant - I've watched all three seasons probably eight times at least - and it's a testament to the greatness of the show how well the comedy has held up. Universe, bring me more episodes, please. And at least one extended George Michael/Maeby/yay-we're-not-related make-out scene. I am not essing around.